I am getting ready to leave

I want to leave it all behind - tooling down the highway at some insane speed (the autobahn so it is legal to do so - smartass) and screaming my fool head off. I want to wake up and to be in another bed in another time and everything to be different. I know this can't happen, no one gets to wake up new tomorrow, but then again we do everyday. I light a candle and say a prayer that the next moment I remember that is because I am marveling at how true it is & not because I am trying to talk myself into or out of something. the cats are snuggled in next to me clueless that I am about to destroy their happiness by getting up and moving around. I am trying to decide which shoes to wear tonight, easy to get on and off or girlie shoes. I found out last night that my Statler used to live with the ex-owner of DiFranco, such is the full circle of my life. Perhaps as the dolphins fucking everything else will come back around as well. & I know this is rambly - I'm gonna go watch some movies.


Anonymous said...

My thoughts have been traveling along the same road lately. I’ve been thinking about spreading my wings and waddling away (penguin style).

No one gets to wake up new tomorrow. No sparkle. No plastic film to protect the finish...and yet I want that. A new place and a new name.

Yeah, it’s partly running away. What the hell is so wrong with that? Why should I stay in this identity that I don’t feel that I had all that much say in making? I coasted. I accepted others’ identities. I let other affect me more than I should. Now, what I got ain’t all that.

We are all given a second chance, or so the saying goes, but it is always with the same you. For me, that same old me, just doesn’t seem like enough. I feel like I am wearing a coat that doesn't fit right. Not to big or small but, the buttons are not quite aligned, one arm is slightly longer than the other, and there is this off smell.

I’ve been thinking about the people I’ve met and read (seen or heard) about that chose a different name for themselves. A new identity away from that which is disappointed, or hurt, or lost. A new beginning with a new name. A new you.

I’ve been thinking that Von sounds like a good new name. A new me.

Von “Old Ira”

Jezcabelle said...

Well, Von I love u whoever you are. Cuz U are a good man.