Dreams

I actually dreamt this morning. It was a return to a place I've been only in dreams. In the dream I was trying to escape, as the building was about to be destroyed but I kept getting further in trying to save others. With every step further in it was being revealed that we just needed to leave, to stop trying to fight & get out. It was a government conspiracy to destroy a building full of families & young people - my friends some I recognized, some I haven't met yet. Of course there was a boi & it was "Mr Man of My Dreams" - same dude I've been dreaming of for years - still haven't met IRL. Part of the reason I was there was because he was on his way back to us & then I was supposed to leave with him. He was our collective ride/trying to get help for all of us. The rest of me was realizing that even if he brought the promised help they were going to kill everyone there & destroy the building. As I woke up I was railing over that fact & trying to get people to leave with me - the only way out was into the water. At one point they were looking online & it was being revealed that we weren't "supposed" to be getting out. There was no place for us to go. I remember arguing about whether we could make a difference fighting as they rolled in tanks: survive & witness & keep fighting or stay & die, martyr to a cause no one knew existed.

Moral is that just because I see the truth I cannot make others see it. & just because I know they need the information if they won't take it from me then they are responsible for their own lives or lack thereof. I need to let go of the guilt.

Much better now, thank you.